Tag Archives: Shame

Path of Love

pathoflove Path of LoveI went to Path of Love hoping that it would help me deal with a constant feeling of mild anxiety that I was experiencing. Whenever I wasn't engrossed in some activity, I felt anxious and I just couldn't seem to shake it.

David Guetta's "When Love Takes Over" (Featuring Kelly Rowland) always reminds me of my Path of Love Experience. Play it as you read along:

There were some obvious contributing factors: I had been ill with Chronic Fatigue for over two years, and although I was gradually recovering, my limited energy and feeling constantly unwell for such a long time was a constant source of frustration. I was also lacking direction generally: it had been about six years since I'd had a full-time job, and I was unsure how to find a new vocation earning money doing something that I loved again, especially with the added burden of illness. … Continue reading…

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The Dance of Fear by Harriet Lerner



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The main thing I got from this book is that fear and anxiety aren't just individual problems; they totally affect the way we relate with each other. Anxiety is contagious and gets passed around between us whenever we interact with anxious people. Families, companies, organisations, churches, countries and social groups of all kinds can become infected with anxiety that affects everyone in the group. When a social system becomes fear-based or shame-based, everyone in it suffers.

Since anxiety causes suffering, we naturally want to escape. One way of escaping is to dump our anxiety on someone else. Being a sensitive person, I've always been susceptible to having other people's anxiety dumped on me, but it's only now that I'm learning to recognise when this

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Escaping Toxic Guilt by Susan Carrell



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Five Proven Steps to Free Yourself from Guilt for Good!

I came across this book while scouring the library shelves for something on topic of dealing with shame. Guilt and shame are close relatives. This book defines guilt as feeling bad about something you've done, and shame as feeling bad about who you are. Hmm... I could relate to that.

Firstly the book distinguishes between good guilt, which reminds us when we've violated one of our own personal values and prompts us to make amends or to act differently next time; and bad guilt, where somebody else's agenda is at work causing us to suffer unnecessarily or to fall under their controlling influence.

In the second section, the author outlines some common guilt-inducing situations, like relationship break-ups, divorces,

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Shame

I recognize shame in myself as the fear of what other people think about me. While many people feel shameful about a specific event that has happened to them or something they've done in the past, for me it's more a general fear of what other people are thinking based on my own feelings of unworthiness. It makes me feel self-conscious, restricts my movements and actions, leaving me feeling trapped. It's common for many people to feel a sense of shame about themselves. At an anger management workshop I recently attended, I felt free to dance uninhibitedly at the end while I noticed the girl next to me being much more constricted. Healing shame is a process, and she was slowly releasing her inhibitions as she was making progress. Shame is still one of my main areas of frustration with myself, but I have come a long way when … Continue reading…

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