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I've been playing guitar for around 6 years now, and I can strum up a decent tune on my own or playing with friends. But I get nervous playing in public; I feel anxious and my mind wanders through a series of stressful thoughts like “I'm crap!”, “They (whoever is listening) won't like it”, “They won't like the song I've chosen”, “My singing sounds bad” etc etc. It's exhausting!
The first time I played guitar for an audience was in my guitar class, and although I was nervous, it went really well. The teacher wanted us to have a good experience playing in front of people, and the best way to conquer the fear was to play in front of a friendly crowd who were all in the same boat as beginner guitarists.
The next time I played in front of an audience was in a comedy club, doing a … Continue reading…
A friend of mine who has been clean for a while now recently told me that he'd come very close to taking drugs again. I was concerned, and a bit pissed off. So I made this video to help out:
Are you feeling stuck, depressed, anxious or unmotivated? Life not working out the way you would have liked? Looking for someone to blame for your unhappiness?
Perhaps you're being held back by unconscious trauma from a difficult past life!
Learn how to heal it in this exciting new video:
I often meet people on the spiritual path who are working very hard to "dissolve their ego". In this video, you'll learn exactly how to do it:
I went to a local open mic comedy night here in Sydney on Wednesday night, to get up and do a four minute set.
There is plenty of angst on display by the comedians on the night for the audience's entertainment. The MC leads the charge with a series of acrostic poems clearly displaying his disdain and resentment towards his stepfather. I didn't even know what an acrostic poem was, so it turned out both enlightening and educational. He also does several bits in between other comedian's sets, about his experience of depression, and of ironic conversations with his therapist.
Several other comedians also speak about being depressed, taking antidepressants, seeing psychiatrists, psychologists, counsellors or therapists. Most of the stories sound funny, most of the time. But these people are clearly suffering.
I get a strong sense that a lot of … Continue reading…
Understanding and dealing with Anger is difficult!
Watch this unscripted intimate unfolding between me and Authenticity and Conscious Relationship Expert Chiara Gizzi, and their experiences and insights with this difficult emotion:
I spent this afternoon playing drums with my new musician friends from kirtan, for two different local groups of disabled people. I have never actually played with this group before, so I'm not sure what to expect. Although I've been playing drum kit for a while and used to play tamborim in a samba band, I've never played the drums I'm playing today before either (a cajón and a dunun), for more than a few minutes. So really all I can do is wing it on stage in front of our captive audience.
The first gig is for a group of adolescents with Down syndrome. Despite my lack of practice, experience or rehearsal, they love it. If there's one thing to be said for people with Down Syndrome, they sure know how to let loose and have a good time. Before long they are … Continue reading…
I'm not going to lie to you: making mistakes still freaks me out. There's something about getting things wrong that causes me to break out into a cold sweat. Even if I'm at home playing music by myself, just the thought "What if I get it wrong?" induces enough panic to throw my concentration out, leading to a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It's easy enough to see where this paranoia comes from. I grew up with a mother who criticised my father for almost everything that he said and did, and this led to arguments that I found very frightening. Most of those arguments were about who was right and who was wrong in the previous argument, so I learned from a very young age that it was extremely important to be right all the time if you wanted to avoid degrading humiliation and … Continue reading…
I was at a rebirthing/breathwork workshop on the weekend, and we did an exercise called Primal Law. Our Primal Law is our most negative belief about ourself. I started out with the usual list of negative thoughts about myself that I've come up with in workshops a million times before:
- I'm not good enough
- I'm bad
- I'm wrong
- I have nothing to offer
- I will fail
But the one that really resonated with me was something somebody else came up with:
- I'm not safe
Well, no wonder I feel so anxious with a Primal Law like that. The next step was to convert the Primal Law into an Eternal Law that represents the truth of our existence; even though it seems like a lie at first, given what we've been telling ourselves for so long.… Continue reading…
I grew up in an environment where everybody kept their feelings to themselves. I was a sensitive kid with very strong emotions that I didn't know how to express constructively. The people around me didn't seem to have emotions, because they never talked about them. Over time I developed a deep sense of shame about my feelings, and learned to suppress, suppress, suppress.
At the same time, strong feelings of emotional abandonment as a child led me to become terrified of rejection. I didn't know at the time that feelings are what build empathy and connection between people, and that the emotion-less communication strategies I had learned from the adult role models around me made the very thing I was most afraid of, rejection, more likely to happen to me.
As a young adult, I had panic attacks when strangers … Continue reading…