The Night My Father Died: Using Contemporary Popular Music To Help Heal Grief

Contemporary popular music can be a powerful tool for helping heal grief. This essay begins with an autoethnographic case study of my personal lived experience using contemporary popular music to help manage, regulate, and heal the often-overwhelming emotions involved in grief.[1] I will also analyse this personal experience using a psychological framework highlighting the strengths of contemporary popular music for resolving grief.

It has been four years, nine months, and thirteen days since my beloved father died of cancer. He had been ill for three years, so it was not unexpected, but it was and still is a huge shock. Fifteen months later, my mother also died of cancer. Nothing in life had prepared me for the shock of both my parents dying. I feel shaky all day, every day. My head hurts, my body feels tense, my shoulders ache. It feels like a part of my soul was … Continue reading…

Emotional Turmoil

My artistic vision for this work was to create a through-composed track using melodic riffs that came to me while going about daily life and represented how I was feeling at the time. I was partly inspired by Paul McCartney waking up with the early stages of Yesterday in his sleep. I deliberately didn’t think much about traditional compositional structures like harmonic progression, pentatonic melodies or 8/16 bar phrases, so the result is very experimental and relatively unstructured.

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Grandmaster Flash & The Furious Five: The Message album art with Remix Heaven

Remix Heaven

The big day has finally arrived and it’s time to record my Live Loop performance of God Is Smilin’ On You. Most of the performance is spontaneous and improvised, but I had some specific ideas about the start and end of the track, and a few lyrical phrases I really wanted to include.

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Alchemy synthesiser screenshot

Oh My God!

My bespoke workflow is highly intuitive, based on whatever subconscious thoughts and ideas come to me. The next idea was to use granular synthesis in Alchemy to manipulate the sound of a female orgasm. Our lecturer had taught us granular synthesis in class, so I’m sure he’ll approve, and this seems like the ideal use for it.

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