A lot of my friends tell me that they're struggling with addictions of various sorts. Some of them describe themselves as “sex addicts”, and a surprising number of those are female. Of course, I never meet them until they're already “in recovery”, do I?
Everyone else I meet seems to be either alcoholic or codependent. They don't have time to hang out with me because they're always too busy “going to a meeting”.
So just to prove that I'm not bitter or anything, here are 12 signs that you're addicted to 12-Step meetings:
- You decided to stop attending 12-Step meetings for a week, but only lasted a couple of days
- You wish people would mind their own business about the meetings you go to, and stop telling you what to do
- You've switched from one 12-Step group to another in the hope that this would keep you sane
- You find you have to attend an “eye-opener” meeting early each morning just to get kick-started for the day
- You envy other people who can go to 12-Step meetings without getting into trouble
- You've had problems connected with excessive 12-Step meetings during the past year
- Attending too many 12-Step meetings has caused you trouble at home
- You find yourself meeting other 12-Step group members at parties because you just don't ever get enough
- You tell yourself you can stop attending 12-Step meetings at any time, even though you keep going when you don't mean to
- You've missed days of work or school because of 12-Step meetings
- You have “blackouts”: extended periods you can't account for, during which other 12-Step group members tell you they saw you in meetings
- You feel that your life would be better if you weren't spending all your fucking time in 12-Step meetings